Part 57

"Arnav puttar, sometimes its easier to talk to a third person. Puttar, its painful for you but I feel you should talk it out. If you do not want to talk to anyone... go into the fields and talk to the trees, mountains, wind! Vent it out, puttar,  release your burden! Get back your strength" Papaji paused for a second and said with twinckling eyes..." You cannot talk to the stars like khushi does..... Its overcast now. "

Arnav looked at papaji. "I want to talk to you!" he said. Papaji placed his hand on Arnav's shoulder and they started walking along the fields not bothering about the noise and disturbance of the passing by vehicles.

"Arnav was talking for a very long time, without waiting for the responses from Papaji." Papaji was a good listener. There was a complete silence for a long time after Arnav had finished his story.
"This seems to be a big trouble. But it was good that you talked about it. We will be well prepared for this. Arnav puttar, however we try to run away, our past catches up with us like a ghostly shadow. Let us face it. We have to find something for counter attack.... Shastra se Shanti! We can ensure peace only with the weapon. This seems weird but it's a fact of life. Power and weapons bring peace, law and order. Weapons work as deterrent power. Let us find out a weapon powerful enough to counter attack."

Arnav gaped at papaji. He felt much better. He had someone who shared his secret.
"That's why I want to keep everyone away from this trouble. I need to face it alone. No matter what will be the out come. But I don't want to put anyone else in trouble anymore. " Arnav said seriously.
"That's right puttar, but remember your near ones are going to be affected anyway by this. So why not take them into confidence and fight it out together?" Asked papaji.  Arnav shook his head gravely.

"I know, Di too will have to face it with me. She will be devastated. But.. how can I tell this to Khushi? You know her beliefs! She will not accept this. I cannot take her rejection. So I decided to stay away myself." He said with wet eyes.

"Puttar, this is what you think about her reaction. How can you be so sure? You have an option. You can decide not to tell her anything about it at all. Or just go and tell her everything and face the consequences." Said papaji. Arnav had no answer.
" .. Ok. In that case, do you want me to talk to her?" Papaji asked Arnav.
"No! if at all she should know about this, I will be the one, I will tell her. But I need some time and your support ...." He said resolutely.
"Yes. I can understand..." Said papaji placing his hand on Arnav's shoulder and pulling him into a hug. He felt sorry for Arnav's plight.
"Arnav puttar, its only 9.00 pm and I have to talk to my lawyer. I am sure we will soon have something up our sleeves for counter attack and by the way, .... Please remember, you are not alone. I have people who play a big role in UP elections..!" Papaji said smiling. Faint smile appeared on Arnav's face.


Khushi waited eagerly for Thursday to arrive. Papaji and Arnav were to finish their business tour and come back on Thursday. She had decided not to go to the office  that day. But she had to, since Shondeep had some urgent work to finish and wanted her help.
She was furious about Arnav's behavior. "Every time he leaves me like this. But this time I will not let him do this to me. I will have all the answers from him. He cannot do this. I am not a toy, play for some time and throw away.. He must answer me this time." She thought anger mounting and smoldering her.

She went to office but waited for Papaji's call. At lunchtime she saw papaji entering the office. She ran forward looking for Arnav. But papaji went straight to meeting room. She ran behind "Papaji, when did you come? And where is he?" she asked looking around.
"Puttar, he had some urgent work so he took a Delhi flight from Mumbai, curtailing his trip." He said expectantly. He waited for her outburst and it did. "What? He did not come? I should have thought about it. He ran away again from my questions. Papaji, I am not going to leave him like that. I will get my answers from him." She trembled with fury, her face red and nostrils flaring up she went on ranting...

"Khushi! Control yourself!" Papaji roared raising his voice above her. She switched off immediately shutting her mouth.
"Khushi! This is office. Control your emotions. We will have enough time to talk about it. Please go back to your work." Papaji said calmly.
She came back to her cabin muttering and frowning. How could he do this to her? Why couldn't he understand her feelings? What did papaji talked to him, which made him, leave her like that? She had to wait till papaji got some time to talk to her. She tried hard to concentrate on her work.
In the evening she waited for papaji to finish his work. She wanted to go home with him, Papaji came out of the meeting room with Shondeep late in the evening. Khushi was getting impatient. She took car keys from him and headed toward the parking lot. "Khushi! Let me drive" Papaji said taking the keys from her.

"So?" She asked papaji in a tone of cross examining him. "So what, Khushi?" he asked gauging her. "Papaji, don't try my patience. What did you tell him on Sunday night?" She asked in accusing tone. "Nothing Khushi! I briefed him about the information I got about this Sham" He waited to take breath and then said, "Khushi this sham has a political connection. He works at the orders of some MLA in Kanpur. That upset Arnav. Now he has to deal with politicians too. That's it!' He said all this in one breath and stopped.
"So? What does this so-called politician has to do with our relationship. Why did he behave like a stranger next morning? She asked clutching papaji's hand. He did not answer.
"Papaji, you are hiding something from me. Tell me what is it that made him so unreachable?" Khushi asked raising her voice.

"Khushi! Things are not that straight forward as you think they are. Dealing with these people is a very dirty game. He wants to free you so that you don't get hurt and he can take on these people. "
"What? How does cutting me off from his life help to take on the bull by horns? I don't understand both of you. And I have observed! Now a days you always take his side. I don't approve of this. You are my papaji!" She went on another track.

Papaji smiled. "Khushi puttar! Try and understand. These matters are very difficult and complex to explain. He needs some time to gather himself. May be he wants to be free from this relationship!" He had pulled over had parked the car on the edge of the road.
"What? He wants to be free? But I never bound him in the relationship. Why is he pushing me away? He only said he wants to marry me again... " She clutched her head for stopping it from spinning. She was all lost.
"Khushi, its not like that. May be he wants you to be more happy with someone else!" he said gauging her.
"Someone else! My foot! How can he think about it? He.. He is so unpredictable! I ... I will not leave him like that... I will .. I will!" She was so furious; she forgot what she was saying. She started frowning and muttering.

"Stop it! Khushi, come back. He is not here! He is not listening to you and probably will not! So stop sulking." Said papaji shaking her.
"Fine! If he does not want to talk to me, so be it. I will not talk to him till he talks to me! I will wait!" She said resolutely, tears rolling down on her cheeks.
"Khushi, don't worry! Everything will be ok!" Said papaji. ":What OK? Nothing is going to be ok from now on." She said crestfallen. Papaji had no answer.


**** ****
Arnav was on his bed trying to concentrate on work staring at his laptop. His eyes were burning. He needed a sound sleep badly. He had not slept well for last three weeks after he came back from his Nanded trip. The sleeping pills had not worked eigher. He felt sleepy but he knew that would not last long.  He dozzed off only to wake up with the nightmare.

He was walking with his Di down a never-ending deserted street with tall green trees on either side of the road. He saw someone dragging a girl. Sham was dragging Khushi away. A muffled scream left him "Khushi..!" But his Di stopped him from going after her. She ran forward, and started dragging Khushi with Sham, away from him. He saw people shouting at him and pelting stones at him. He wanted khushi to run away from that place but she had freed herself from the clutches of Sham and Di with a wrench and was running toward him getting hit by the pelting stones. He floundered like a fish out of water. "KHUSHI!" he screamed...

"Arnavji" He heard Khushi's voice. He opened his eyes and saw Khushi standing at the door of his room. He closed his eyes tight. What was that? Hallucination? Was he having another nightmare in this nightmare?"

"Arnavji.." he heard her voice again. He saw her coming in the room shutting the door behind her. A surge of pain in his shoulder blinded him.....