Arnav closed his eyes. He still had not come out of the morning dejection. Payal had unfolded Khushi's childhood.
Khushi had celebrated her 8th birthday with her little friends. She had gathered lot of gifts. Her father had promised her a doll. But he had forgotten his promise and Khushi, though received some fantastic gifts, from her parents, was wild about it and went on ranting. Her father said he would get the doll for her. Her parents went out to get the doll, never to come back from that fatal accident.
Khushi did not understand why they did not come back soon and why they were sleeping in the hall. and why others are crying. She thought her parents did not the get the doll they had promised her in the market and that's why hiding their faces. She tried to wake up their lifeless bodies shrouded, saying, they can go tomorrow morning in search of the doll and she did not mind waiting for another day for the doll. She had cried that they slept without singing lullaby to her. No one had anything to offer her any consolation. Her uncle babuji.. Took her to his home after the funeral was over, telling her that her parents had gone to Alahabad and would come once they get the doll.
"Arnavji, Khushi waited for her parents for sodays together. Babuji got a new doll for her everyday, but she refused to play and waited for her parents. She kept on telling my babuji to call them back and said she did not want the doll but let her parents come back...
Slowly she realized that they were not going to come back. The reality had sinked in and she started blaming herself for her parent's death. The guilt was killing her from within."
"After that she never celebrated her birthday. She does not talk to anyone and doesn't even come out of the room... This is the only day she locks herself in the room. She does not like anyone to enter her room, talk to her or console her. We just wish this day is deleted from our lives and the next day dawns early." Payal couldn't control her sob, Unable to continue, she left. Arnav had come to his room dejected.
It was 8 in the evening; Arnav rang the bell waiting at the front door of Khushi's house in Kolkata. He had boarded the plane and had taken a taxi to reach papaji's house. He did not know why was he there and what was he going to do. He just wanted to be with her no matter how would she react.
The butler pulled open the door and took the his bag from him. He went to tell about his arrival to other people. Khushi was playing with the kids and Elsa was in his room connected to her US office. Khushi was surprised at his arrival. "Arnavji?" She was smiling. He felt better. Both kept looking at each other, their pulses racing.
"How come? You were to visit on Sunday, right? Have you bought a monthly pass from the airlines?" She asked grinning and walking towards him.
"Ok fine. Should I go now? You want me to leave?" He asked in mock anger.
"No I didn't mean that..." She was nervous looking at his anger.
The kids had already started pulling Arnav's hands and pestering him to play with them. He smiled at them and lifting Tej walked away from khushi. She kept looking at him. "Why is he here? Papaji had told me that he will come on Sunday for their business trip to Nanded to visit the Sahakaar Co-op spinning mill" The phone rang and Khushi picked up.
"Khushi, its me Papaji. Has Arnav puttar arrived? I am on my way and will reach in 10 minutes," Papaji said from the other end.
"Yes papaji, he is here. Did you know he is coming?" She asked in surprise.
"Yes puttar, there is some pressing work." He said and hung up.
It was almost 9 in the evening when papaji came home. They had dinner together. Papaji and Arnav were in the study after the dinner. Khushi was whiling away time. There was no sign of both the men coming out of the study. She waited for them but later on she went to sleep.
She prayed her Devi mayya to give her strength and forgive her. "Hey Devi mayya, have mercy on me for I am the sinner and my sin has no remission. I have to carry this burden of sin on my shoulder throughout my life.... " She sat there for a long time. Even after twelve years... the intensity of her guilt had not reduced. In fact it had increased as the years passed by. Tears rolled down her eyes unknowingly. "I... I did it.... I .. I am a killer.... I killed my parent..." She started weeping silently. The raindrops were dancing on the makeshft tin shade at the corner of the garden....
There was a knock on the door at midnight.....
Khushi stopped suddenly. She was weeping for a long time. "No.. I can't open the door... No one knows about it.... I can't show my face... I.. I.. should sleep now! " She said to herself and hurriedly went to her bed, switching off the lights. She waited with baited breath. The intensity of the rain outside had increased.
There was a bang on the door again. "Khushi.." Elsa had called. Khushi got up with a jerk. "Elsa bhabhi? at this time?" She came to the door but again went back as she heard other voices.
She heard Arnav, "Khushi... open the door! I know you are awake! I saw you switch off the lights just now! Open the door! Else I will break open!" He said threateningly.
She opened the door. Everybody except the kids had gathered. They all came in. She tried to hide her face from everyone turning to face the window opposite the door.
" Khushi putter" mummiji called her warmheartedly. Khushi denied turning. All looked at each other hopelessly.
Papaji came forward but "Please leave me alone... please... "Said Khushi sobbing. Papaji stopped dead and turned. He signaled at Arnav. Arnav stayed there and others left the room.
He put his hand on her shoulder. She was trying to control herself, trembling uncontrollably. "Khushi....! Chalo! Come!" He said turning her around and taking her with him. He came out. All were waiting.
Mummiji spoke first. "Khushi... Happy Birth Day!" She spoke driving her wheel chair nearer.
"No...!" Khushi cried and turning her back broke into a run to get to her room. Arnav stopped her in the middle. Held her tightly in his arms. Papaji came near and handed the car keys to Arnav. He took the keys and clasped Khushi's palm in his and walked towards the front door. She walked with him hypnotized.
He made her sit in the car. Mother nature was out pouring. He drove away without a word. He took her in that rapid rain to Robindro Lake, her favorite place. It was pitch black outside and pouring. He switched off the car lights. Released his seat belt and helped khushi release hers. She was trembling. He put his arm around her shoulders and pulled her into his arms. She lost control. She poured her heart out on his chest. And outside, Mother Nature was pouring her heart out. Robindro Lake was filled to the brim... on the verge of overflowing...
"Khushi...! I am sorry! I cannot talk like other people. I cannot find words to console you. I can express myself neither with the words nor with my actions. Khushi... try to understand... I grew up suppressing my emotions, my sorrows and even happiness. What I express is only the anger...It gives me strenght... I don't know words, Khushi... .... I am not the right person in such situations. I do not know how to solace you, Khushi... please... please... I cannot be a support .. I am sorry Khushi... I am not the one with words...... " He swallowed hard. Tears welling up in his eyes. He opened his mouth .. But only he could speak was her name in a hoarse voice. He could not say anything that he thought.... He could just hold her in his arms and let her cry on his shoulder. He waited not knowing for how long...
Khushi's sobs subsided slowly. She lifted her face and looked at Arnav's wet eyes. "Arnav ji, I.. I am a sinner..." She spoke with great efforts. She tried to open the door. He helped her. Opened his door. Both of them came out in the rapid rain. She marched a few meters ahead leaving him behind in dispair. He did not go after her but leaned against the bonnet and waited, looking at her drenched figure in that rain.
She stood like a statue lifting her head towards the sky. It was pitch black with no starts to talk to. She just looked up drenching in the rain completely and so did Arnav. She looked at the Lake. Its black water absorbing the rain looked like an ocean, deep and mysterious. She slowly turning back to face Arnav. He came up to her.
"Arnavji...I .. I killed them.. they were shrouded like these stars..." she said. Arnav embraced her like never before and spoke "Its not you, Khushi. Its your fate..." He suddenly stopped. Khushi too looked up at him.
"Did you say FATE?" she asked. He nodded in acceptance. The person who smugly said he wrote his own destiny was accepting the supremacy of fate and destiny. Faint smile appeared on both the faces. He looked at her face and without even knowing what he was doing started kissing her eyes wiping off her tears from her cheeks. The rain subsided....The catharsis was over... He had liberated her from the guilt....
Khushi looked at the ocean like Lake. "Arnav ji, this looks like a ocean... like you. Arnav means ocean in Sanskrit, deep and mysterious, with the treasure deep down. No one can touch its bottom. " She said resting her head on his chest. He kept looking at the Lake.
He, with her in his arms walked up to the car and opened the door. She was about to enter but took her foot back...
He looked at her questioningly. " It's a Mercedes. Will get dirty and get spoilt..." she said guiltily, looking at her drenched pathetic condition.
He nodded hopelessly. "Khushi... it's a thing... it is for us. And we are not for this. Understand? It can be cleaned... Do you want to walk down the distance to home in this rain, only because the car would get dirty?" he asked smiling and came unto her and pushed her in the car. Both of them drove away to their Home.... Khushi looking sober and calm... drenched completely in his love. Arnav controlling his urge to grab her agian and taste her lips...!
Khushi had celebrated her 8th birthday with her little friends. She had gathered lot of gifts. Her father had promised her a doll. But he had forgotten his promise and Khushi, though received some fantastic gifts, from her parents, was wild about it and went on ranting. Her father said he would get the doll for her. Her parents went out to get the doll, never to come back from that fatal accident.
Khushi did not understand why they did not come back soon and why they were sleeping in the hall. and why others are crying. She thought her parents did not the get the doll they had promised her in the market and that's why hiding their faces. She tried to wake up their lifeless bodies shrouded, saying, they can go tomorrow morning in search of the doll and she did not mind waiting for another day for the doll. She had cried that they slept without singing lullaby to her. No one had anything to offer her any consolation. Her uncle babuji.. Took her to his home after the funeral was over, telling her that her parents had gone to Alahabad and would come once they get the doll.
"Arnavji, Khushi waited for her parents for sodays together. Babuji got a new doll for her everyday, but she refused to play and waited for her parents. She kept on telling my babuji to call them back and said she did not want the doll but let her parents come back...
Slowly she realized that they were not going to come back. The reality had sinked in and she started blaming herself for her parent's death. The guilt was killing her from within."
"After that she never celebrated her birthday. She does not talk to anyone and doesn't even come out of the room... This is the only day she locks herself in the room. She does not like anyone to enter her room, talk to her or console her. We just wish this day is deleted from our lives and the next day dawns early." Payal couldn't control her sob, Unable to continue, she left. Arnav had come to his room dejected.
It was 8 in the evening; Arnav rang the bell waiting at the front door of Khushi's house in Kolkata. He had boarded the plane and had taken a taxi to reach papaji's house. He did not know why was he there and what was he going to do. He just wanted to be with her no matter how would she react.
The butler pulled open the door and took the his bag from him. He went to tell about his arrival to other people. Khushi was playing with the kids and Elsa was in his room connected to her US office. Khushi was surprised at his arrival. "Arnavji?" She was smiling. He felt better. Both kept looking at each other, their pulses racing.
"How come? You were to visit on Sunday, right? Have you bought a monthly pass from the airlines?" She asked grinning and walking towards him.
"Ok fine. Should I go now? You want me to leave?" He asked in mock anger.
"No I didn't mean that..." She was nervous looking at his anger.
The kids had already started pulling Arnav's hands and pestering him to play with them. He smiled at them and lifting Tej walked away from khushi. She kept looking at him. "Why is he here? Papaji had told me that he will come on Sunday for their business trip to Nanded to visit the Sahakaar Co-op spinning mill" The phone rang and Khushi picked up.
"Khushi, its me Papaji. Has Arnav puttar arrived? I am on my way and will reach in 10 minutes," Papaji said from the other end.
"Yes papaji, he is here. Did you know he is coming?" She asked in surprise.
"Yes puttar, there is some pressing work." He said and hung up.
It was almost 9 in the evening when papaji came home. They had dinner together. Papaji and Arnav were in the study after the dinner. Khushi was whiling away time. There was no sign of both the men coming out of the study. She waited for them but later on she went to sleep.
She prayed her Devi mayya to give her strength and forgive her. "Hey Devi mayya, have mercy on me for I am the sinner and my sin has no remission. I have to carry this burden of sin on my shoulder throughout my life.... " She sat there for a long time. Even after twelve years... the intensity of her guilt had not reduced. In fact it had increased as the years passed by. Tears rolled down her eyes unknowingly. "I... I did it.... I .. I am a killer.... I killed my parent..." She started weeping silently. The raindrops were dancing on the makeshft tin shade at the corner of the garden....
There was a knock on the door at midnight.....
Khushi stopped suddenly. She was weeping for a long time. "No.. I can't open the door... No one knows about it.... I can't show my face... I.. I.. should sleep now! " She said to herself and hurriedly went to her bed, switching off the lights. She waited with baited breath. The intensity of the rain outside had increased.
There was a bang on the door again. "Khushi.." Elsa had called. Khushi got up with a jerk. "Elsa bhabhi? at this time?" She came to the door but again went back as she heard other voices.
She heard Arnav, "Khushi... open the door! I know you are awake! I saw you switch off the lights just now! Open the door! Else I will break open!" He said threateningly.
She opened the door. Everybody except the kids had gathered. They all came in. She tried to hide her face from everyone turning to face the window opposite the door.
" Khushi putter" mummiji called her warmheartedly. Khushi denied turning. All looked at each other hopelessly.
Papaji came forward but "Please leave me alone... please... "Said Khushi sobbing. Papaji stopped dead and turned. He signaled at Arnav. Arnav stayed there and others left the room.
He put his hand on her shoulder. She was trying to control herself, trembling uncontrollably. "Khushi....! Chalo! Come!" He said turning her around and taking her with him. He came out. All were waiting.
Mummiji spoke first. "Khushi... Happy Birth Day!" She spoke driving her wheel chair nearer.
"No...!" Khushi cried and turning her back broke into a run to get to her room. Arnav stopped her in the middle. Held her tightly in his arms. Papaji came near and handed the car keys to Arnav. He took the keys and clasped Khushi's palm in his and walked towards the front door. She walked with him hypnotized.
He made her sit in the car. Mother nature was out pouring. He drove away without a word. He took her in that rapid rain to Robindro Lake, her favorite place. It was pitch black outside and pouring. He switched off the car lights. Released his seat belt and helped khushi release hers. She was trembling. He put his arm around her shoulders and pulled her into his arms. She lost control. She poured her heart out on his chest. And outside, Mother Nature was pouring her heart out. Robindro Lake was filled to the brim... on the verge of overflowing...
"Khushi...! I am sorry! I cannot talk like other people. I cannot find words to console you. I can express myself neither with the words nor with my actions. Khushi... try to understand... I grew up suppressing my emotions, my sorrows and even happiness. What I express is only the anger...It gives me strenght... I don't know words, Khushi... .... I am not the right person in such situations. I do not know how to solace you, Khushi... please... please... I cannot be a support .. I am sorry Khushi... I am not the one with words...... " He swallowed hard. Tears welling up in his eyes. He opened his mouth .. But only he could speak was her name in a hoarse voice. He could not say anything that he thought.... He could just hold her in his arms and let her cry on his shoulder. He waited not knowing for how long...
Khushi's sobs subsided slowly. She lifted her face and looked at Arnav's wet eyes. "Arnav ji, I.. I am a sinner..." She spoke with great efforts. She tried to open the door. He helped her. Opened his door. Both of them came out in the rapid rain. She marched a few meters ahead leaving him behind in dispair. He did not go after her but leaned against the bonnet and waited, looking at her drenched figure in that rain.
She stood like a statue lifting her head towards the sky. It was pitch black with no starts to talk to. She just looked up drenching in the rain completely and so did Arnav. She looked at the Lake. Its black water absorbing the rain looked like an ocean, deep and mysterious. She slowly turning back to face Arnav. He came up to her.
"Arnavji...I .. I killed them.. they were shrouded like these stars..." she said. Arnav embraced her like never before and spoke "Its not you, Khushi. Its your fate..." He suddenly stopped. Khushi too looked up at him.
"Did you say FATE?" she asked. He nodded in acceptance. The person who smugly said he wrote his own destiny was accepting the supremacy of fate and destiny. Faint smile appeared on both the faces. He looked at her face and without even knowing what he was doing started kissing her eyes wiping off her tears from her cheeks. The rain subsided....The catharsis was over... He had liberated her from the guilt....
Khushi looked at the ocean like Lake. "Arnav ji, this looks like a ocean... like you. Arnav means ocean in Sanskrit, deep and mysterious, with the treasure deep down. No one can touch its bottom. " She said resting her head on his chest. He kept looking at the Lake.
He, with her in his arms walked up to the car and opened the door. She was about to enter but took her foot back...
He looked at her questioningly. " It's a Mercedes. Will get dirty and get spoilt..." she said guiltily, looking at her drenched pathetic condition.
He nodded hopelessly. "Khushi... it's a thing... it is for us. And we are not for this. Understand? It can be cleaned... Do you want to walk down the distance to home in this rain, only because the car would get dirty?" he asked smiling and came unto her and pushed her in the car. Both of them drove away to their Home.... Khushi looking sober and calm... drenched completely in his love. Arnav controlling his urge to grab her agian and taste her lips...!
6 comments:
Thank you for all your comments...
This is how they celebrated her birthday... with Robindro Lake and mother nature...!
Love
KF
Awesome update!! How beautifully you have defined Khushi and Arnav's feeling!
Your writing skill is just awesome...
I really enjoy your updates..this is also a nice one....kash ASR jan pata ki jab KHUSHI AR me kam karti thi to bina bataye poora ak din "ISI VAJAH" se nahin aai thi....kash...
Emotionally power packed episode, hope Khushi sees the light and stop blaming herself...... kkg fan
Excellent update. Beautifully narrated and scripted so perfectly. YOu are an awesome writer and for this wonderful track you deserve a BIG HUG from all of us. thanks KKG. Making them celebrate her birthday with Mother Nature and the ocean was simply superb. They make a wonderful couple (soul-mates). Comparing Arnav to ocean is amazing. Khushi is a darling. Looking forward to a lot of fun ahead. Bye and take care.
PS
KF, I had tears in my eyes reading what you wrote about Khushi's birthday! What a sad thing to happen to an 8-year old girl.
Am glad that Arnav took her to the lake and in that time, together with mother nature, her non-existent guilt has been released. And Arnav coming to visit her when knowing her situation proves that he is learning to be a better person, and he is also learning to not suppress his emotions.
Loved the update.
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